No one wants to suffer. All living organisms, including human beings, have an innate desire for growth. However, our conditioning can create unnecessary frustration and pain. The three fundamental approaches I use in my practice will accelerate the change process, allowing you to move beyond any frustrating or limiting thoughts and behaviors.
The three elements include:
1. Brain Rewiring
Most of the emotional reactions that cause us discomfort or pain are the result of patterns that have been wired into our brains when we were very young. Our culture hasn’t understood that these reactions need to be rewired to reflect our resources as we mature. Many of these reactions have caused a great deal of discomfort or pain. There is always an underlying positive motivation in all behavior and Brain rewiring allows us to fulfill this positive intent.
Most people have experienced a great deal of frustration trying unsuccessfully to stop a behavior that isn’t working. Change occurs quickly and permanently with brain rewiring, replacing any ineffective pattern with one that is more creative, satisfying, and sustainable.
2. Communication Skills
We were never taught how to re-wire the brain, in order to experience the communication skills needed to have successful interactions (personal, social and professional). Science has taught us that we each have a specific “brain style.” Learning how to identify one’s own brain style and the brain style of other’s allows us to communicate more effectively.
We can learn to make the kind of impact we truly desire by transforming our reactions, especially those preventing us from having fulfilling relationships with ourselves, and others. This knowledge allows us to communicate with greater ease and confidence, inviting the positive responses we desire and avoiding stressful miscommunications. It also removes the “conflict out of conflict.” Learning about other communication styles, gives us a better understanding of where they are coming from, liberating us from the unnecessary tendency to take things personally.
3. Learning compassion
In order for change to occur it is essential that we learn to develop feelings of love and compassion. Because we live in a judgmental and critical society most people have not learned how to fully develop these feelings. Brain rewiring and effective communication skills allow us to feel more powerful and productive, naturally enhancing our feelings of compassion.
Once we understand how and when to use these “emotional education” tools, we begin to communicate more effectively. Knowing how to rewire our brains, we are no longer in ineffective patterns from childhood. We begin to replace the messages that taught us to be critical and judgmental with more compassionate and dignified ways of looking at our own behavior and the behavior of those around us. By developing the ”receptive response,” we can fully ”take in” experiences that are positive and transformative.
Once these three elements have been synthesized, we become more open to new ways of communicating, we becomes more compassionate, as we are no longer stuck in old conditioned patterns. Learning this new form of communication reduces stress and frustration, and enhances our self-esteem. The synergy between these three pillars of change inspires us to grow beyond what we previously thought possible.
I know how important support has been in my own transformation and I want to support you in any way that I can. I have worked with people all over the world and can be available in person, on the phone or through Skype. Please check out my website helenkramer.com I have written a number of blogs to give you more tools for liberation and fulfillment. Feel free to contact me at firstname.lastname@example.org and I will get back to you as soon as possible.
“Helen Kramer is a master therapist. She has the capacity to zone in and understand the depth of pain and discomfort one is experiencing like no other person I have known. Her ability to get to the root of an issue quickly, dig into the sore spot and extract the venom is phenomenal. I highly recommend her method, her humanity and her expertise as someone you want to surgically remove your emotional discomfort.” AA, NYC
“When I first met Helen she told me that I could change any pattern in my life that was troubling me. Of course, I was both skeptical and hopeful because I had tried therapy in the past and read so many self-help books and nothing seemed to change my painful relationships with men. She gave me concrete tools that made me feel better about myself, improved all of my relationships and ultimately led me to the most joyful, loving relationship of my life. Helen is the most accepting, nonjudgmental person I’ve ever met. Her compassion is inspirational. She is truly unconditionally accepting and taught me how to love myself and love and be loved by others more deeply. I don’t know of any greater gift.” JER, NYC
“You don’t meet many Helen Kramer’s in one lifetime. Helen is a mixture of loving support and science. That’s what’s so intriguing. She is cutting edge and yet feels like the favorite Aunt you may or may not have had the pleasure to know in your life. She never misses a beat, is an excellent teacher and has a calming quality about her. She reminds you that you are safe and helps you to learn to live a more fulfilling and loving existence.” MM, Italy
“Helen helps you see yourself for who you actually are. She works with you to remove layers of insecurity, self-doubt and irrational thinking, to reveal your inner strength and truest person. She teaches you how our brains can sometimes trick us into thinking we are less than we are, or are unable to do something or be someone. Helens helps you avoid those delusions, and corresponding behaviors, that hold us back. Most importantly, she helps guide you to your own discoveries, rather than spouting her professional conclusions, which gives you the tools to successfully deal with challenges on your own (when you are outside of sessions).
Helen is deeply compassionate, extremely intelligent and highly intuitive, and has transformed how I think about myself, and how I approach everything in my life – from love and family, to work and friendships.” JH,NYC
“Helen connected the dots and gave me more tools in our first session then I had in my previous nine years of therapy. I couldn’t believe how quickly my depression began to melt away and I was finally able to move out of a painful obsessive romantic relationship. Helen possesses a rare combination of intelligence, intuition and compassion and I found working with her inspirational. She taught me pragmatic tools that I can use in my life outside of our work together so that I feel more powerful and capable than I have ever felt. It’s as if I have finally come home to myself and have become the person I always longed to be.” SM, New Jersey
“A friend of mine gave me a special gift, a session with Helen. Because I live in California we were only able to work on the phone. I was skeptical that a phone session could help me because at the time I was extremely depressed and hopeless. Helen had the ability to quickly get me in touch with positive feelings that I didn’t even know existed anymore. She gave me the tools to build on these feelings so that they began to permeate my life. I had tried therapy so many times before working with Helen and I don’t think I would’ve tried again if I hadn’t been given the gift of my first session. Her combination of kindness, compassion and expertise in creating meaningful tools has truly transformed my life.” MAL, San Francisco